My protest against communism was borne from the feeling that to ask from children or all people to confess all the same things, which are impersonal and meaningless (or wrong of course) is a mistake and that conditions which make political positions the only way to success make life dirty (and me hopeless). But dirty got my life afterwards and the ones following had a much better, painless life. This can be better understood when reading forward.

So communists did hate and could not convince me. More than that, every time I had to talk about it, some more people were convinced against it. I could explain to be on the side of those who communists were telling to represent, when contradicting them. But some people representing communism did state in our classroom, that communists are having the means to make people stronger intellectually more capable, healthier and nicer in their hands and their enemies are sick. When not convinced with politics, pupils and people did still follow to this. I was mistreated at a doctor on a regular check and got sick the same week. Since then I never ever had again a real medical treatment and I always was more or less sick. I was humiliated for being sick and punished for it, I was made sicker and never respected any more at all doctors in whole communist Romania with no important exception. In unbelievable way this continued even worse in Germany after the political breakdown of all eastern European countries. But not in the first year, when doctors behaved normal and seam to care, without being able to understand or cure any of the willingly created illnesses. Later this changed into making me sicker and not treating me anymore. There were and are exceptions, but nobody who could help and not really in the needed branch.

I was very successful at school in the matter to have many friends from native Romanian speakers and to be respected and known almost from all the pupils of the school. This I reached through caring for those having problems and helping them. I found easy some friends sustaining me sporadically with this and so I could always reach my targets (which were: standing for justice and helping others for this matter), even when not being neither the strongest nor the smartest and there were often many and older and stronger pupil on the deserved looser side.

When the communists did discover this and even not depending on this success of mine, they planed to make an antisocial out of me, this generally was the way to answer to protesters. Many pupils from my form and a few in the schoolyard (with "Securitate" officer as parents and near to them) did willingly fulfill this matter. My antifascist position was transformed in an 'antigerman' even an 'antiromanian' position. National feelings of both kind of native speakers were used to fight me. Many other apolitical matters were used to catch me guilty (and foolish). Mostly this did not succeed, but my personality was still severely damaged and my life got terrible unpleasant and dirty. My following childhood and youth were full of daily calumniations, trials to destroy my good image and to provoke me to fail in different ways and with different matters. I could fill books with telling all the crimes and mistreating which happened. Important is that several illnesses were predicted to me and chemical substances were used to damage me and to get me there where they wanted to have me: the foolish antisocial who can never be right with anything. After years there was nobody anymore on my side and even my family were intensely participating on this trial. My family solved all my "problems" by stating that always those from my form having the communist political positions would be right in any matter, punishing me for not accepting that, predicting me illnesses too (which I had), using chemical substances to change my personality (which officially do not exist). I could fill other books with telling the actions of my family against me, which in the essential meant, that I have to be the foolish clown who everybody can humiliate as he wants and who is never allowed to complain. Always there to pay for the others, never there when life is fun (communists did really have those things to make people better, my family too, others too, but nobody for me!). Any trial to be accepted intellectually and any respect were forbidden at home. Every attack against me was right, all there problems were mine, none of mine theirs. They knew about illnesses created and predicted from some people representing communism and were calling them right. They new some adequate doctors and used them for everybody from the family excepting me. Of course my parents do not sustain me with my trial to escape from torture and to get compensation even today.

But the reasons I want to ask for compensation for and the crimes I want to escape from are mostly not nameable here. It is about versatile secret service methods combined with the willing contribution of many people from all societies I was living in, on an unimaginable continuous crime. Never anybody, including my family, was standing on my side. I can here give just some isolated examples and not write down the worst things because these are very complicated to understand and very dangerous to tell. The methods are used for other purposes too, not always for crimes and they are secret.

• Continuous attacks of different kind as described above almost daily, starting from the age of 5 up to today.

• Many isolated severe crimes I could neither defend nor get compensation for them, never the criminals were punished

• Very many predicted illnesses which I really had, also predicted changes into bad of my exterior and of some abilities, sometimes even years in advance and repeatedly, which all happened, I could not change anything.

• To be antiromanian was stated by mister Harald Scherer born in Sibiu (Hermannstadt) / Romania who was discovering, that when I told to like Walt Disney comics more than the comics from the communist political children - newspaper (Arici Pogonici) which would be so nice, then I do hate the Romanian people which have so wonderful artists to do those comics (and I would hate that). This person had the essential contribution in destroying my image in the school and my classroom, visibly in the assignment of communist interest side, and really severely damaging me with many things. Many unknown people on the street did know later about this antiromanian position. Again, my family contributed to this, even when they had to know that I am intellectually and morally posed not to be able to fail here, they reacted in educating me in an antiromanian way and discovering this position later on some happenings, which still were invented. They additionally then spread this information to the neighbors. This was their help. Politics in the family! This guy H. Scherer would have ended in jail in a non communist country (not for this telling of course) and the many things he did and stated would interest people who are standing against communism and seeing a reason today for fighting that side.

• My uncle (Richard Wagner from Göppingen Germany, brother of my mother) was visiting us in Romania telling that there would exist in German hospitals a new disease, where the eyes are closed for a week and you lay in bed with temperature. Even when all of my family had closer contact to this uncle (or his wife, nurse), I was getting sick 3 days later and my eyes were sealed with dry purulence for exactly one week (I could open them with my hands for short time on the day). Parents didn't get a doctor. Despite I was the only protester against the communist enforcement from my family, while others were rather example for the officials, this uncle and other members of my family were trying to teach me to hate the so called “western side” with very many games played to me and additionally chemical substance used. They themselves were playing to represent this side.

• One of our neighbors was a high positioned Securitate (Romanian communist secret service) officer. His son was trying very hard to get close to me, but I was trying very hard to avoid this. He was talking to me about if I am grateful to the president that he takes care of all and if I could estimate the high value of the Romanian communist party. When he couldn't talk to me he was shouting from behind on the street some exclamations heard at presidents speeches. He was a pain to me. But one day he discovered after snubbing me for having such things that I did repaint a toy car made in western Europe. Then he blamed me for that, telling that personal contributions considering own free will are not wanted in the western world. I would have to admire those cars not my own possibilities. I did contradict to this, then he was calling me a criminal, just criminals would repaint cars in the 'west'. We were both too old for toy cars, almost mature. I told unhappily that I guess rather an active, aggressive communist, son of a Securitate officer could get some problems with the police there. Then he told me that he won't punish me in Romania for this, because he discovered that I would hate the western world (which he explained before would hate me anyway) and he has no reason for action, but I will be punished later when changing to western Germany (a hidden will of mine then, not of my family, but still easily predictable), he will take care of that. I answered him: “please do so, but I guess you will get the difficulties”! He answered that he discovered that I would have severe psychical problems because the communist economy would be so weak, that I repainted the western toy car in a green color even, which they do not like at all. They would believe him and not a nobody like I am. He added: “one more word and you will have the problems the day you arrive in Germany”. He was younger than I was (this son was changing in exterior, height and estimated age very quick, guess it was a role not a person) and an impossible person. I was an extreme victim in that country. Just for the sufferance I had to be compensated in the western world, if existing, even ignoring politics, but much more considering politics, so I didn't stop to blame him. I was attacked and humiliated the first day I reached Germany, qualified from German secret service as antigerman, brainwashed in the direction to change that. Later the police discovered that I do have a psychical disease, in a car accident where I had no contribution to, it was a from specialists posed situation. The prove of my innocence was through situation and physical environment possible, but police reacted: 1. punishing me for tearing there attention to that prove (you want to command us? No one could think that, the way I was talking); 2. Discovering that I would have produced that accident because I was looking so guilty (no prove); 3. Discovering that my position, that all would have been different than they tell, would be a persistent fantasy. Later for standing to this fantasy I was qualified to be crazy (like my grandma) and closed therefore up with force against my will in a psychiatric institute. Doctors were excusing but telling me they couldn't risk to loose their jobs (persistent, pointing visible on: you are not in communism anymore), they had to decide on police evidence (which evidence was a lie) and not on my visible behavior. Law in Germany didn't give me a real possibility to defend (without friends and connections).

• The neighbor of that grandma which told me to be so very convinced against fascism was a native German speaker who intensely I could here and see defending fascism and stating his (her) conviction for that side. My grandmother told me, that during second world war they couldn't defend from the talking and the loud German radio coming from them. She explicitly told, there was no police to help them, when it was too loud, when it was German radio. Later she blamed this neighbor in many words. During the discussions I could see my grandmother morally on the better side even regardless of the political positions. For these accusations the neighbor was calling police and my grandmother had to stop. The neighbor was not punished for his statements. Today a daughter of this family (her grandmother was in charge, but the whole family were standing together, not contradicting anything), married in Germany a German policeman. In several car accidents and other happenings in Germany, where I honestly was never guilty at all and nobody could have avoided, police was quickly discovering me on the guilty side, even when it was mostly provable to them and to a lawyer or judge that it couldn't have been my fault (and it never was). The situations looked to me posed and the police was humiliating me, behaving mostly aggressive and provoking, using chemical substances too, like so often so many people in my environment, to get my psychical abilities down. For example to make me feel bad and guilty even when I knew exactly that I was not and it was clearly possible to prove that and other influences (like getting me unfocused and/or jumpy). Police is continuous against me.

• At the age of 3-5 years I was with my parents at relatives of my mother in a village, all native German speakers (dialect which Germans could hardly understand). A group of 10 – 16 years old boys were jumping from at least 3 meters down to a hayrick (at least 2.5m height and 2.5m diameter). I was pushed together with my 2.5 years older sister to climb with them on a beam of the very high barn. We did so. On the beam they started to tell “oh, the fine sir is with the winners here”. They were all surrounding my sister, three of the oldest touching her body on such places that I was trying to help,also hearing her protest and strange sound of her voice. She told me to take care of myself. Then they were throwing her on the hayrick. Some were jumping too. I was not let close to the place one could jump. One told, the fine sir wants to jump there (he is on the other side, to his friend), turning me with the face away from the hayrick. I didn't want to jump at all, telling this. Then they were pushing me down there, with the face not in the direction of the hayrick. I landed at least 2.5m away from the hayrick losing awareness. When awaking I tried to stand up, but I couldn't move and my had was terrible aching. I watched at the perfect blue sky (don't know how I reached that position). No one was caring for me, I felled like somebody is watching me. Suddenly I felled warm and could move (and so happy). It was nobody around. Then I could see and hear the others jumping. Nothing happened, I was not visibly hurt and could normally move. I walked (I wanted to run but had was then still aching) to my father to tell him that I was almost willingly killed (people around were wondering how I could speak so sage words, if I knew the meaning). My father had no time for me, pushing me away. He was occupied with killing flies which bothered him very much. I told him repeatedly what happened, but he did not believe me. He even started to tremble and continued to call me loud a liar. When he couldn't send me away he told quietly to be happy to be alive. Then the oldest woman from that barnyard came out of the house telling to my mother which just arrived: He (about my father) was brave like this guy from a German fairy-tale which killed seven flies by one strike, writing this on hes suit without naming who was killed, so everybody was bending to this hero (“Das tapfere Schneiderlein”). But nobody ever attacked my father which the communists, I could see later, trusted, because he was teacher. Which was my position and where was my fault, anyway? When considering the truth, that the happenings described here are just a small extract of happenings of this kind in my life, the mentality of these criminals was always that of those surrounding me and my rights and life quality were daily like on that day. This including representatives of law and church in those two states (Romania under Ceausescu and Germany of today (since 1990)) I was living in (serious, truth could be just more in my favor). Later the old woman told, when I was talking about there was somebody invisible to help me: 'stop with this, stop it, we don't believe this nonsense anymore', then angry to my father: 'the telling was that my boys should be better now and how can he (me) speak so clever all the time, he didn't have the time to learn all that at his age, my boys did not in double time. There is no wonder, so they have thrown the right one down, I can rely on my kids. I did not understand the meaning of that telling, but later even my father changed on the side of my enemies, like all environment, that means on the side of people which continuous find a way to attack, to damage me where I continuous can not find a reason neither defend.

• Later in a summer, about 2 years before changing teeth, I was playing with the children of my mothers brother. We came to talk about that happening with the hayrick and I was standing to my position, that somebody came to love me before I recovered, it had to be god. But Udo Wagner, today living in Esslingen / Germany, 2 years older than me, told that it was him. He said, to believe in god is a weakness one gets punished for, people who don't understand this are the looser side. I contradicted and he told, I would see he is right. About 30 minutes later we began a game, where we all were running the stairs of that house up and down, for a reason I have forgotten. Then Udo told me, that upside on the stairs would be dangerous. I wanted to ask why, but he was pushing me already down. I was scared, but strong enough not to fall, stopping after three steps. We continued the game and Udo was hiding behind a door and coming to push me from behind each time I was starting to descend. Before he was pushing, he was making a noise. Then he was just making the noise and I was securing scared, expecting to be pushed. He was hidden behind the door. I stopped and then he asked if I felt he would be behind. I agreed and he answered: 'see, so it is me the one behind, this can be done'. I told, no this is not the same, and he remained at the position that it is him, the one behind. We were arguing and he gave suddenly back. I forgot the matter, but next time when I was at the stairs he made the noise, waited a while for me to think it was just the voice, came then quickly from behind the door to push me very strong. I felt down the stairs loosing 2 teeth. Downstairs (about 30 steps) I was laying about 5 minutes without to move, unable because of aches. His sister was coming to look, but they were both hiding, without to tell anybody. Even later, until today my cousin remains at the position that it is him the one behind. But he was later going to church, very accepted in society, and I was the fool attacked from anybody anyway. I was humiliated and damaged about other 15 times from relatives of my mother. My mother punished (means: social -> talking, behavior; chemical: smells and other simple substances accentuating feelings, making dizzy and intellectually unable, like drugs; other) me really in unbelievable way, all childhood through, consequently for not being foolish. I was accepted just when doing or telling something foolish.
  
  At that age my knowledge about even stronger secret service methods for manipulation of people was already old and I had often been a victim of such influences. But I didn't tell a word because I really believed in God. I could really make the difference between being loved or being pushed!! Could you, dear reader? Love never tells to love in order to push you, it loves and helps you! Be warned from fascism and communism. Even when different sides, they both use these methods of manipulation never caring for any kind of people except their own power, people officially representing these sides lost and both interest sides are still represented from many people in the world (which, believe me, are often the same or unite in their actions), acting hidden with criminal but effective methods, never showing their face in direct way, having almost whole Germany in their hands (especially police, law, church, medical stuff, etc.) today and since years and a lot of power in many countries in the world, where I can not estimate how much. Please really believe in God and really stand for him! Of course not all people telling, no matter how, to love you, hate you and fight God, but this is used from people having such positions, so be carefully (there is a difference)!
  Sorry, nothing about sex here, no misunderstanding please. Real justice would close people to jail having that kind of courage to humiliate or blaim such an extreme victim like I am, to search for perfection (for example conclusions resulting from wrong formulation of sentences, etc.) on the victims side, before intending to help, but ready to see the mistake and blame or punish. I was really contacted with such matters!!

• Today in Germany many people with visible changes which made their exterior and their feeling in life much better than naturally (conclusions on their feelings are possible through their behaviour, even when this is limited), are searching for me to ask me, if "this would be good (fine) enough"? Often, if they are men, they talk to each other: 'he doesn't want it, isn't it?' Then the other: 'no, just look at him' (laughter).

• After my unlucky telling about to stand for US side, where people are having democracy without communism, I was brought in a situation to face a black man told do be from Africa (from a friend country to socialist countries). The people around (was being student in Jassy / Romania) were telling me, that this is an original black man from his home Africa, if I would have a problem with him. I told no, and everybody around was laughing very loud (like they did there sometimes to me). On such laughing positions were also members of my family, other native German speakers and some native Romanian speakers I knew before. Everybody in the whole world was called wrong and criminal from some representants of communism and their followers, except communist countries, even when and while continuous crimes were happening there against a defenseless civilian from very many people inside a communist country. I was, with rare, hidden exyceptions, the only one I could ever see criticising communist countries.

• All doctors in Germany do continue not to do their job right, as above told. The truth for my statement that I don't have on my disposition medical care since 1977 is achieved through many visible happenings with medical personal but more than that through wrong treatments and avoiding necessary treatment without a clear prove for the failure on the criminals side. Still even my reliable, only basic medical knowledge could prove in most of situations, that when deciding not to treat me or when treating me the way they did, doctors failed. Schooled medical personal cannot be so foolish consequently also unable to contradict my positions (and proves!), never willing to follow those presumptions, without being able to explain that (e.g. 1. Many different doctors which I do visit change their meaning about my illness in the same period of time without doing additional checks then and without knowing from each other. But never my position which is constant and provable. 2. Blood checks were always perfect, contradicting the direct conclusion about a created, active infection. Then I tried these on a day having a temperature from a cold (without telling this), but an extended, expensive blood test proved that I was perfectly healthy with ideal values. 3. A "very healthy" frequently opened and x-rayed tooth was breaking showing visibly an untreated, sick root; etc. I could add very many facts here).

• The secret service (Securitate) officer in Romania who was talking to me at Romanian army (while I was serving there) promised me that I will be punished in Germany for the many anger I caused them there (the will for depart was never stated). But I could hardly imagine to be more punished for nothing than words. And I couldn't believe it would be possible there and anywhere in the western world. But he explained me that they would seriously punish there the people, when not having the right positions in life (not guessing that I could see the many communist secret service methods, brainwash and repeated attacks with chemical substances, all combined mostly, as a severe punishment, also that I was practically excluded from society and continuous blamed as result of a communist political game, what means a severe punishment). That they (in western Germany) will see me on the wrong side, Securitate will take care off, I shouldn't doubt that. He predicted me a lot of trouble with doctors.

• In the same place at Romanian army, I was trying to explain some day to the other soldiers of our dormitory about the president Ceausescu (whose known profession was cobbler) and the food missing in the stores, that a shoemaker should stay at his profession, using the German telling “Schuster, bleib bei deinem Leisten”. But while I was talking I got terrible headache like somebody would push nails in my had and couldn't find the words, neither in Romanian nor in German, still easier with that. A soldier who knew some German helped me out, so that the thing was understood (even when normally I knew the language of the country rather perfect and I was proud about that), while I was getting dizzy and I was feeling more and more queasy. One of them told, you won't listen to a German, he is the enemy, forgotten? I was pointing it against my will in a way this would be a German matter, wondering and excusing myself afterwards. Strange things seam to happen inside me, in fact I could not talk, not form the words anymore (in the half of my telling, before any blaming started). But the majority of the soldiers, once the matter understood, were defending me, happy and friendly. My own will, which was clear at least since many years, about this telling, changed repeatedly while I was talking and I couldn't do anything about it. I lost my own will and understanding of myself inside me, feeling tortured even when staying untouched. This was not for the first time, but always when talking about political or other interesting matters (see secret service matters, third section on this Internet page). When recovering, I added quickly, “he will have to go, with his wife”(Which was owning many political functions), having a feeling, this will happen. The majority of listeners were showing clear sympathy. Few days later, many soldiers (half of them unknown, which couldn't have heard my telling) were coming to me, to tell me personally, that they would have a nice new pair of shoes from the shoemaker of the facility and I would have just this old and nasty pair of shoes. I should pass there, to get some new, they were fresh delivered. One told, I don't know if this would help him, he seems to be old and nasty himself, to come from an old and ugly time. I passed (had to, because shoes were suddenly about to break) at the shoemaker, but he told me, 'we don't have anything anymore', then lately, 'for you', so I will fix these old ones. For one day he gave me a pair of shoes with nails in the base, with the cusp pointing to the feet, which could be lightly felt when walking. This won't be a problem for me, he asked, for one day only? I said no, but he repeated for three times, “isn't it, that this is no problem for you”(he meant communist equality?)? In that night we had a special training, marching with 30kg on us about 30km in the early morning. Speed in marching was checked and trained. I could feel the nails in my shoes so that I wanted to scream continuous, but I didn't of course. One nail entered in my left foot up to the bone (> 2cm).

• In the same place, at Romanian army, I was not treated at the dentist, with the explanation. “you will go in the freedom sufficiently to dentists, we here won't do anything for you anymore” (at this moment whole family had planed to leave, but nobody should have known this). As a result of this, an untreated tooth, which had to be extracted caused an infection which had to be treated with antibiotics but the whole medical stuff was in those days at a schooling and I was not allowed to leave place and I was not treated even when I was trying everything (somebody had to be there). The evening before it appeared, two soldiers were talking to each other about in the past, bad guys were burned with candles on the left or the right side, so one side was swollen in the morning (but the hate against me was not personal and people were kind generally). I had terrible aches which got worse when moving my legs and was forced to participate on an endurance run for 5 hours. Because the illness was not treated it got chronic, so it is one of the illnesses which do create me sufferance today and which were reasonless willingly created to me (when they had a reason there where same or much more reasons for any other criminals ever living on this earth for their crimes, but I do hate crime, which is never allowed!)

• Since I live in western Germany, I had very many happenings, which were to me clearly visible posed situations, in which I had to face difficulties where my problems could be seen caused by a property or situation which some Securitate people and / or communists were explaining me (and to others) to be a failure of non communist organized countries, causing many difficulties to the people there, but I was not believing it. The small mindet, partial, communist explanations were not at all proven through those happenings and the situations were an exception, proving well knowledge about the communist explanations on the side of those posing them. More surprising some people around were reacting like knowing me with these kind of communist positions or as problems making. I was blamed and punished with secret service methods, not officially. Therefore (and for similar reasons) I contacted German Ministry of Interior Affairs. Never I had to earn more humiliations by words, than during these trials to clear some things with them. They discovered first, that I would have a psychical disease (be crazy).
  I was asked from some people around me in Romania what I would find about shopping in western countries, with the implicit answer that it would be foolish to write in magazines about people enjoying that. Even when I was consequently with all my meanings and positions against a socialist or communist society and rather for the so called “western world”, to the end of eastern power many people doing wonderful, never knowing about torture and persecution, did know exactly that I want to criticize that western world talking about such matters to me on the street or in open places. I did of course contradict, was bothered by such tellings but did not take them for important. The answer then was, that I would be crazy always contradicting and I will see it is no good thing, this shopping. After changing to “western” Germany I could enjoy shopping even when I am a man. But I was attacked from very many people especially in big super markets, which were exposing me to very aggressive and bad chemical manipulations and were moving around me and influencing me acoustically in a provoking way, trying obviously to get me angry and to get me problems and to look like a problem maker. At least 30% of visitors in each super market in any town in Germany where I was staying longer than a day or two (but just there!) did participate on such actions, knowing exactly who to attack and acting together like 1 person (e.g. a humiliating telling was started from a person and finished from another one, even when the second could neither hear the first nor know exactly when I will pass moving fast, from natural information ways, the same attack was done from very many people all knowing exactly when I will pass, expecting me already without being able to see or hear me, etc.). Through the years this got stronger and it got really unpleasant to me (some more examples of actions: hiding my shopping basket, placing some with similar contents instead but 1 or 2 differences with articles for women, at the cash desk, regularly 3 to 10 people were passing me just few moments before I reached it, so that I always had to wait even when it was almost free when arriving there, cashiers slew down in speed where I was waiting obviously and regularly so that it took at least 3 times longer for each person than normally, often even much longer, many other tricks). Important: none of these tricks could be an impression of mine, but the opposite, changing in bad of my psychical situation was reached there through willingly made chemical influences (through the air), too, but not in a way to not allow me to estimate the reality in perfect way, but just in a way to create me sufferance and to make it hard to withstand their provocations. Today this got back again, but still didn't stop, appearing just in some shops. Still I find shopping a pleasant activity. Also attacks do happen in similar way sometimes on the street.

• As an add on to the above told, the only people I could find around me and in official positions in Germany for years, which despite the daily crimes committed against me did not contradict me when talking about having to face difficulties, were trying to teach me that all these problems are caused by money and by a society organized on money. Many were trying very hard to teach me this, during several years, but they were never having to face any difficulties about that, even when I tried to involve more people in such discussions. But I was many times discovered to have such positions (I can explain why I never had) and severely punished for them mostly with hidden, secret service methods (with explanation delivered verbal) and partially in official way (while the official way had no explanation, that means just crazy reasons).

• .... this was a very small part of political caused sufferance done to me, an innocent civilian, in times of peace inside of different countries by state power! The sum of torture and sufferance created to me in Germany is much bigger than that from Romania, even when not visible from told matters (which were from both sides just a little extract)!Why? And who is doing this? I have never done any harm to anyone! To continuous persecute an innocent person, stealing it abilities and values daily is certainly an extreme kind of criminality. Jail was invented for people not understanding that nothing of such things could be allowed, but in todays Germany the state defends and produces this criminality and many people do participate willingly on it (which generally get presents from society). This is much worse than just severe discrimination. Which is my fault?? Could really compensation exist on this earth to equal this infinite crime? (this can't be a feeling, it's the real situation)

• When simple words, which weren't wrong, but no matter if, could cause so much sufferance to the innocent telling them, like explained above (just a little extract, there is much more), then what can these words about sufferance reach? (about words: I can not imagine a motivation for enyone who is not on extreme fascist or communist side to start any kind of actions against me and criminals not working with and for state power are not having any chance today in Germany)

Archived contents, todays life

Todays life happenings:
Short story bold

The only difference between power and crime is to consider justice, to have a justification.
                                                Norbert Kailan

I mean civilians daily life, but it is applicable also to weapons and war. For above telling I hate people in Germany which tell that the only success and way to get it against communism and eastern countries was to have bigger values, stronger economy. Almost nobody in Germany was or is taking position against communism or former eastern political block and if, then that foolish way. I was fighting communism and eastern Europe socialism myself, transforming my life into torture and risking even my life for several times. The real advantage I had was my justification, I could explain why it is right to do so, convincing even some of the communists, which for I was called dangerous. I wasn't having any values to make the difference, things they don't have as a reason to humiliate them, like it is done willingly to me continuous in the western side. This “western” Germany succeeded what the communists couldn't: to break my will and take me my justification and also my freedom of thinking away. German police are finding me dangerous, but never explained why. They did everything in the interest and fulfilled many revealed plans from communists and eastern secret service personal which were telling me fearless, that they will punish and beat me in western Germany what happened to every detail and was executed from every interest present here. There is a justification to ask for help anyone being not such an extreme victim like I am and this even unpolitical, because I had just words and was not active in politics. About those around which dear to call themselves good and to blame me the same time: